Thursday, 19 January 2012

Achievement Whore

Where have I been the past few days I hear you ask - well I have been going to bed at 4am each day....because I've become an Xbox addict.
I've played console games for many, many years and suddenly - with the introduction of a new dashboard (that's the 'home' menu screen for any plebs out there) one that tells me what my achievement ratio is like, (achievements are won by playing games and doing difficult tasks in game) has made me quite...obsessed about the whole thing.
The first time D worked out the ratio from the information on screen we laughed and I gloated at how my ratio was higher than his.
The following day after unlocking new achievements I asked him to recalculate....and then several times a day since then.
Poor D.
I began playing games to get 100% complete or 1000 of 1000 gamerscore. I've done this with FIVE games in the last month - count them - FIVE!!!! And have now become a complete addict. Every night I'm just trying to get "one more score" as D heads to bed at 9am. Come 4am I'm blinking at the screen wondering where my life just went...

I've even joined A FORUM, yes a FORUM. to talk with other addicts (everyone seems awake at 2am) and get tips on achievements I'm struggling with (trust me here some are VERY difficult to obtain)

I've even started buying my old games from 5 years ago on ebay so i can replay them - for more achievements. This is kind-of good as these games are mere pence now, but D keeps giving me the 'eye' particularly when he returns home and my "news of the day" is that I played monkey island three times today to unlock all the achievements and speed play achievements.

Heck as I'm writing this even I start wondering if I have a problem - but at the moment it's keeping me amused. By the end of December I want to get, and maintain, a minimum of 75% completion achievement score across all the games.
And obviously get as many games as I can fully completed

Monday, 16 January 2012

A squirrel fuelled shopping trip

I know many of you know of my love of squirrels. Begun at the age of 5 with some rare red squirrels, continued by foamyand then encouraged by the ones that live at the bottom of the garden.
Well today I apparently have squirrels on the brain. Concerned about the lack of mr and mrs squirrel over the winter - they usually stop by every Sunday - I've completely over filled the bird table, feeders and covered most of the floor to lure them out.

Then I went shopping...

I returned home with this terrific pair of squirrel pjs with tiny squirrels on the bottoms. They are the cosiest, comfiest pj's I have EVER owned. The top even has the caption "I'm nuts about you"
And they have squirrels on them.....score!


Who could avoid buying these with that squirrel full of attitude on the cover. Seriously, I bought like six.

And then it wasn't until I arrived home and discovered later that evening the gift I bought for D...some brilliantly expensive chocolate-caramel-banoffee pie bar had a.....

Yes a squirrel in a TUX on it - classy chocolate ;)

EDIT: This morning mr squirrel was feeding at a neighbour's bird feeder...ten minutes later and with some stealthy moves mr squirrel is now feeding from the neighbours bird feeder at the bottom of MY garden - they're MY squirrels dammit!

Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Exercise Routine

Now you can do it too!

Step 1 - conveniently leave cordless house phone in upstairs office
Step 2 - using one of many sites (I chose Amazon) request a callback
Step 3 - Choose option NOW not 'in 5 minutes'
Step 4 - Run out of living room and up flight of stairs
Step 5a - Remember you're ill and start panting ** Optional
Step 5b - Burst into office in way of TV cop show.
Step 6 - Hurdle pile of boxes and stock that you were going to put away later (laundry can be used if boxes are unavailable) and which is strewn across the entire floor
Step 7 - Start throwing empty boxes behind you (great for working the biceps)
Step 8 - Crawl under computer chair to reach desk
Step 9 - Answer phone

and repeat ad nauseum.

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

Notice boards #2

At my local supermarket on Sunday I discovered what I thought was another funny announcement board notice.

"Unwanted gift, Still wrapped - £45 call..."

I couldn't stop laughing at it and the ambiguity, D and I were discussing just how much we could get away with wrapping up our random junk worth mere £'s and turning it into £££'s by simply wrapping it in Christmas paper and putting an ad up.

...then I moved the card to discover the one above had plopped down over the top line entitled "Set of dumbells" - oh I see, the person writing the card wasn't as dumb as I first though...
Needless to say we adjusted the card back to it's funny style (dumbell line covered up) and left quietly while still giggling to ourselves.

So we add now to our lessons of "How to use a notice board"
Leave the top line BLANK - in case of upper card fall-age.

Friday, 6 January 2012

Words are not enough

My thoughts on reading this - in numerical order;

  1. How brilliant
  2. Why didn't I think of this
  3. Would I really make a good assassin?
  4. Probably not
  5. Who can I get finally kill off now...
  6. What group of people shall I hit since it's cheaper
  7. I wonder if there is a loyalty 'kill 6 get one free' scheme
  8. What if someone hired them to kill ME and that's why I've been so ill....
  9. I wonder if that number really works....dare I ring it....?
I haven't rung it yet....I really want if I get enough comments (because I am not doing this for myself - I mean...what if it's REAL)...I will ring and RECORD my conversation with el Assassin. So you all know what to do....give me 25 hits below and I'll hike to a phone box and ring the number... (because I'm not stupid enough to use my home or mobile phone.) 

And let me know if you think I should be...
a) deadly serious on the phone about hiring an assassin
b) plain desperate - like totally unbelievably over-the-top desperate
c) treat it as a joke
d) use a funny accent and pretend to be a spy
e) give me your totally awesome idea for what I should do

(and if someone from abroad can please promise to take me in if this all goes very wrong and the police and international spies get involved, that'd be great.)

Thursday, 5 January 2012

Three Stops, Three Continues, Three Starts

I read about this three stops, continues and starts idea on a fellow business owners blog and I liked it so much I decided to try answer them myself for the new year.

Three Stops

  1. Leave the market - the footfall is dying and I can't see it working over the start of the new year, maybe mid-year it'll be better when they have finished renovations.
  2. Worrying that some other people claim to do such sales that dwarf my own, my business speaks for itself and being around people who gloat or lie about their takings to wind-up other business holders is not healthy and shows their lack of decorum and business sense. 
  3. Letting paperwork pile up over a week so it seems like too much to do. Start doing it daily or bi-daily as it worked better that way before I formed a bad "it's not as important as sales" habit.
Three Continues

  1. Using Amazon and price checking the entire inventory on a monthly basis.
  2. Posting across our Facebook business page and profile.
  3. Driving - Continue lessons in February and re-book test.

Three Starts

  1. Open a shop and launch a website connected to it.
  2. Make a work time-table to help best manage the time I have and how it should be spent on the different areas of the business. No more feeling like I'm dashing between home, work and on-line and doing a shoddy, rushed job on everything. Factor in some 'down-time.'
  3. Attend a toy fair to view new brands and ideas in 2012.

Wednesday, 4 January 2012

The End of the World Cometh

So I, like most of you are I'm sure, sceptical about the end of the world in 2012. I always take the opinion if the world IS going to end, there is nothing I can do to stop it so I might as well enjoy the ride - hold D's hand and take as many people with me as possible when I go  enjoy what's left.
Well this morning I woke up to something that looked a little like the end of the world was already here.
The forest at the back of my house was bending over, the rain that had fallen was rushing in waves across the floor, the contents of my garden furniture and planters were taking off, and all this through rain and hail so thick I could barely see out.
Once I got past feeling ... shocked. I spent a good ten minutes calling Kara to come in from outside....before discovering her sitting under the coffee table just staring at me. So I sat on the sofa with three pretty nervous cats, looked out again and thought...gees, if you told me today it was the end of the world...I'd believe you.
Then cursed D for being at work - I mean why-oh-why does he have to go back to work, why can't he just stay home with me all the time - sure I know we need the money for bills and rent and stuff, but seriously sometimes I'd rather starve and spend the day curled up with D watching movies - although having done this before I KNOW it doesn't work and I really prefer eating, having a roof over my head...and seeing him before and after work.
But I digress...
Why is he AT WORK on the day the world is ending, talk about abandonment!
In the end I phoned my mum...who lives a mere 0.01 of a mile away, just to know I wasn't alone if in fact the world was ending...which it hasn't...because I'm still typing...
So, I guess we can all be as sceptical as we like or as much of a believer as we like that the world is going to end...but when it finally does (hopefully millions of years from now) we are all going to have the same dumbfounded look on our faces as I did this morning.

Tuesday, 3 January 2012

The Wanderer Returns

So...I'm back. I know you're all cheering inside. After my busyness with the business taking up almost all my blogging time, on the 13th I thought to myself "Hey, I deserve a holiday after this!"
My body, only half listening, or perhaps not listening at all; heard - "let's get really sick and stop functioning"
So I spent my holiday vomiting, dashing to the loo, falling the heck over, and hallucinating that I was in 10001 maniacs and they were trying to get me I said to D before his worry levels for my health hit the roof... "Don't worry I have a plan".
I'm still not better but the toilet trips are fewer and further between and I see a specialist on Thursday. Woot.
A mere 3 weeks and 2 days since I began being ill....the Christmas service sucks.

According to my normal doctor, "something" caused my spleen to kill the majority of my blood and it all went downhill from there. Now instead of bouncing back to good health - I seem to be sprawled on my ass getting there one week at a time.

But I'm back now guys cause all this bile needs a way out and what better way than spewing it across the blog - no...not ready for that analogy yet?
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and New Year - I have stories to share (ones that don't involve bodily functions) but they are for another day......or tomorrow...whatever.